An Empty Tank Spells Love in my Book
by surforst
Summary: Title says it all. Anyway entry for the contest for March at the RS boards. Enjoy.


_"Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your next trip in kilometers."_

--George Carlin

**An Empty Tank Spells Love in my Book**

I.

Shego muttered to herself as she swung the empty gas canister yet again. It was just her luck that the day she trusted one of Dr. D lackeys to fill up the gas tank of the hover car would also be the day Dr. D and her decided to visit a top secret lab in the desert. The thing that ticked her off was with all of his invention know how Dr. D still couldn't create a hover car that ran on something like Solar Power or maybe a miniature fusion reactor. For the life of her she couldn't think of any self respecting villain master mind that would have a hover car that could be filled up at the local gas station. For that matter why did the government insist on building their secret bases all the way out in the God forsaken desert. It was almost like they wanted the hopeful villain, out to steal a few government secret inventions, to sweat on their way there only to find the base lightly manned guarding a device that only blew up when the hero arrived. Had to be a conspiracy of some sort.

Sighing she wiped the sweat from her brow as she watched yet another car drive past her. What ever happened to the days when a person would stop and offer their help? If she wasn't sure Dr. D would have died ten minutes into the walk she would have forced him to deal with this. As it was she imagined he was probably digging holes in the ground by now looking for water. He really wasn't the best case for 'toughing it' after all.

She watched as another car, a beaten up Buick by the looks of it, approached from the opposite direction. She contemplated hitting it with a well placed plasma bolt just to have a little mayhem and destruction to distract her from the heat when to her surprise it actually pulled over. Blinking she approached as a tall well built man, with his hair cut in a short crew cut, stepped out of the car and waved at her. "You need any help Miss?"

The fact that he was a hunk, something she didn't see often in her line of work, was not what shocked her. No the fact that he willing pulled over and offered his help without calling her 'babe' or 'toots' was enough to make her drop to the ground with a heart attack. Shrugging her shoulders Shego decided the heck with it. "Sure I could use a lift to the gas station and a lift back to my car if you're willing."

The man smiled at her and made a motion with his hand toward the passenger side. Nodding her head Shego walked towards the door keeping a careful eye on him. Not that she had much to worry about after all most psycho killers take one look at a plasma enshrouded hand and back off real quick. Though as her grandmother always said 'make sure you don't burn the pot roast before you serve it' which probably applied to being cautious somehow. Nana was always an odd one.

Settling into the sit she put the gas canister on her lap and leaned back. It wasn't the most comfortable car seat by far but it was a lot better then walking the remaining miles. She looked over at the man who was now regarding her carefully before he stuck out his hand. "Well might as well great each other considering we'll be traveling together for a while. My name is Steven Barkin and yours is?"

Deciding it was best not to give her criminal alter ego name she took his hand and smiled back at him. "Shelia Go." Nodding once Steven started back up the car as Shego leaned back. She intended to relax a bit and listen to a little bit of music. "Mind if I turn on the radio."

His chuckle that followed that request caused Shego eyebrow to rise slightly. "Normally I wouldn't but the thing's busted. Haven't the money in the budget right now to fix it."

Shego sighed at that. Shame to meet a handsome looking guy who was dirt poor after all she had her standards and money figured into it. Couldn't live off what Dr. D paid her forever after all. "Shame to hear about that. Mind if I ask what you do for a living?"

She turned to the side even as she asked the question watching the scenery fly by. Why did they think it was a bright idea making such a large space between gas stations? She heard Stevie, she like that name for some reason, clear his voice to her side. "Well I'm the Vice Principal of a high school." A teacher not the most exciting thing in the world.

Clearing her throat she decided that even boring conversation was better then none at all. "So why did you go into teaching anyway? Can't see why anyone would want to deal with a bunch of brats."

He chuckled at that and Shego only grimaced more. It was the truth after all. "Well it was during my time in the Marine core I meet this guy. Nice fellow but not that bright and I just couldn't help but think about the state of education. Long story short I decided to fix it personally after all if you're going to complain about something you should at least have the decency to try to fix it."

"So made any progress with that?"

"A little actually." When he didn't continue she looked over seeing a thoughtful look on his face. Clearing her throat she got his attention again. "Sorry about that anyway I think I made a difference in a few kids' lives and that makes it worth it. Never can tell but I got this one slacker student I've been pushing for a long time. Granted it took him getting the girl of his dreams first but I think I've finally got him motivated to study. Shame he didn't start earlier he's a good kid."

Shego laughed at that checking ahead to see if they were near the gas station yet. Smiling when she didn't see it she leaned back in her sit as Stevie threw her a few confused glances. "Sorry just thinking about this kid I know who could use a little guidance. You'd think with 'Princess' nagging him all the time he'd have buckled down by now but I guess you can't reform everyone."

"I don't know some kids will surprise you." Finally spotting a nearby gas station Stevie turned into it as Shego leaned back thinking.

"Sounds like you're a pretty optimistic guy there."

"Well I figure if their teachers can't even believe in them what hope do they got." Shego nodded at that as the car came to a stop. Guess he had a point there.

II.

Shego gulped the cold water greedily as she watched Stevie place the filled gas canister as well as an extra one he had in his car in the trunk. She watched as he carefully lined each can up and tied them down with rope he had in his trunk to make sure they didn't slid. She suppressed a laugh at the methodical way he checked each knot and shook both canisters to make sure they didn't move anymore then he would allow. Finally frowning he looked back up with her with a slight grimace. "I think that's the best I can do. Ready?"

She nodded at that a smile on her face as she walked over to the car. She had of course offered to fill them herself but Stevie had insisted she get something to drink instead saying he could handle it. Though the guy tried, and she stressed the tried part in her mind on that one, to make it look like he wasn't doing it because she was a woman she knew he was. It didn't offend her she knew by now that the guy was what you could call old school. Chivalry was still very much alive for his type and something in Shego found that cute beyond belief. After all she knew she could take him any day of the week but if he thought he was a 'macho' man for filling up a few gas canisters then who was she to argue. He was nice guy after all and if it made him happy then it was ok in her book.

Taking a sit on the passenger side she leaned back and gulped down another couple of mouthfuls of the cold bottled water. As an after thought she offered it to Stevie and to her pleasant surprise he took it. It wasn't like she wanted to date the guy but it was nice to know a handsome man didn't find the idea of drinking after her a repulsive thing. She wasn't like Kimmie who had blushed that one time when Ron had taken a sip from the water bottle she had just used. Something about an indirect kiss and a reminder of why she was glad she wasn't a ditzy teenager anymore. Sighing she closed her eyes feeling the car start up and turn back onto the road. It wouldn't take long before she was forced to listen to Dr. D rants again.

"So what do you do for a living?" Shego opened her eyes slightly looking over at the nervous man next to her. Seeing her look he actually blushed slightly and gripped the wheel till his hands turned white. "Not to intrude or anything."

Her mouth curled in a grin at that one and she closed her eyes again. Taking a deep breath she prepared to tell a much edited story of her employment. "Well I'm mostly a free lancer doing various jobs. At the current moment I'm working for this one guy who's not very good at his job but he pays well. Though I have to admit my fellow 'employees' are less then stellar examples of humanity if you know what I mean."

"What about your boss he's alright right?"

"Hm...well the doctor, or at least he calls himself one, is a very odd guy. He's prone to pointless rants about the littlest things and you'd be surprise what slips by him. Though just to keep you on your toes he'll turn around and create something that would shock and amaze the scientific community. Of course no good ever comes of it since he really doesn't know what he's doing."

She opened her eyes and saw Stevie was actually listening to her intently. She liked a man who could listen. "Anyway the job pays very well but the hours kind of suck it you know what I mean. Up at the crack of dawn and I tend to work very late mostly just sitting there listening to my boss go on and on. Do you believe he actually has the nerve to use me as a secretary despite the fact that my skills lie elsewhere. I swear the doctor can get real annoying at times and if it wasn't bad enough I got a...younger woman making my life hard at work. It's like her entire life revolves around ticking me off and fawning over that buffoon she drags alone. Yeah I believed they were just 'friends' when I first meet them just like I believe the Queen of England is Elvis in disguise." Shaking her head she looked over again at Stevie and frowned when she saw the rather large grin on his face. "What's so funny?"

"Oh nothing it just sounds like you've got some steam built up over work."

Shego shrugged at that and took another sip from the water bottle. "I hear too many stupid cracks from all sides so it's no wonder I get a little annoyed. Girl has a right to also get ticked off after watching all her effort go to waste because someone can't think a plan through. Other than that I'm just peachy at work."

Shego contemplated chucking the man out of the car when he chuckled at her annoyance yet again. It wasn't right to laugh at how she had to deal with the 'princess' and Dr. D together. Clearing his throat he leaned back as he interrupted her thoughts. "So now that we've exhausted the topics of work what kind of music do you like?"

The rest of the short ride passed in idle chatter before he dropped her off at the hover car and left. Part of Shego regretted that fact. She didn't know why but after meeting the guy something about him just attracted her to him. Maybe it was the boy scout type behavior, the body, or just the way she could talk to him. Shego knew after all that she so rarely got along with other people. It was rare when she found one she could actually talk to and not try to kill.

III.

Barkin cursed as he kicked his car tire again. It would figure that the stupid car's gas gauge would break but at least it was on the return trip from the convention. It wouldn't do after all to be late. Sighing he reached into his trunk to grab his empty gas canister when he let fly another string of choice words. Words he'd send student to detention for. He had left his gas canister with that Sheila woman a while back. Now he'd have to not only walk to the gas station but probably be forced to buy a whole new one. Life was just grand.

Sighing he turned and started on his trip deciding that the sooner he started the sooner he could finish. Kicking a rock as he walked he wondered how Possible and Stoppable handled this mess. From his understanding they should probably be used to being stranded far out in nowhere. Hopefully not violating any of the PDA rules he had set up after all the paper work he'd have to fill out to deal with a pregnant student gave him nightmares. Bad enough when one of the teachers got pregnant considering the paper trail it took just to teach outside this was of no surprise.

He heard a car approaching from behind him and made his way further off to the side. When the car appeared to be slowing down he looked back and saw a rather expensive looking green Jaguar behind him. Who would color their entire car green? His question was answered when the window rolled down.

"Hey handsome you need a lift?"

"Shelia!" His mouth stretched into the first genuine smile he'd had since attending that convention. "I'd appreciate it very much if you'd give me a lift to the nearest gas station and back to my car."

"Alright but you'll have to pay me back. I don't give rides for free."

Barkin frowned not expecting that. Well give someone a free ride and see where it got you. "Alright how much?"

Shelia held up her finger a cat like grin on her face. "One date and I'm paying. Oh and your number too if things go well."

Blinking Barkin could only nod his head in dumb agreement.

IV.

"And that's why me and Stevie are in bed together Princess. Happy?" Shego smiled as she watched the confused red head and her buffoon staring at them.

Kimmie spoke first as she shook her head. "Alright not only is that sick and wrong but didn't you get married recently Mr. Barkin!"

Ron decided to chime in as well to Shego great amusement. Always following the cheerleader. "Yeah Mr. B what about your wife?"

Sighing Shego raised her hand out of the covers and pointed to the gold ring present there. "Doy!"

The two teens just stood there their mouths hanging open till Stevie cleared his throat. "Not that what happened during my private time is any of your business, especially considering it was a couple of months ago, but I have to ask why are you in our bedroom?"

Kim always the leader apparently decided to field that one as Shego leaned in closer to Stevie. She could see the uncomfortable stares Kim sent her way but to her credit the girl didn't lose track of what she was saying. "Well we were wondering why Shego wasn't doing anything recently and when we saw you get in her car we were worried. I mean she's evil Mr. Barkin, what are you doing with her!"

"Actually Kimmie I'm retired and by the way I've got a nice job offer from Uncle Sam. Apparently their really happy with the work Dr. D been doing recently and felt that they could recruit me for some of my special skills." Leaning back with a smile Shego traced her hand along her Stevie's shoulder. "So to answer your question I'm sure Stevie her came willing didn't you dear."

"Well that's debatable." She slapped him lightly on the arm a grin on her face as the two teens stood their still floored. The little pink rodent though seemed to be handling things well and was currently trying to work his master through it. Handy little critter too bad Dr. D never cloned him.

"You're working for the United States now? When did this happen?"

"Well pretty much the same time Duff retired to open up his own haggis and golfing restaurants and Professor Dementor started up his clothing line for shorter then average people. Though this is all after that strange disappearance of Monkey Fist and Motor Ed decision to enter into acting." Grinning Shego couldn't resist one last verbal jab at Kim. "Why Princess is your boyfriend here not providing enough entertainment?"

Kim went red at that and was about to respond when Stevie cut her off instead. "Well if that's the case maybe I should look into doubling your homework. Besides shouldn't you two be studying for a test right now?"

Shego grinned when Stoppable walked right into that. "But Mr. B we don't have a test."

She could see Kim eyes go wide but it was already too late to stop the boy. "Well I'll just have to remedy that then. Meet me at my office at seven sharp." Shego leaned in and whispered in her husband's ear. "Make that seven thirty sharp. Clear?"

The two teens nodded and voiced disheartened affirmatives. Turning to leave Kim looked back as she got to the door. "So no more fighting anymore Shego?"

"Well I can hardly fight anymore with a kid on the way now can I?"

The shocked expression on the two kids' faces was worth that announcement though when the man next to her cleared his throat she suddenly realized her mistake. "What kid?" Shego winced since she had forgotten to tell her own husband the news first. Oh he wouldn't let her live this one down.

_The End_

A/N:Well that's my entry into the March contest at the boards. The theme this time around was running out of gas so I hope you all enjoyed this unique take. I don't know how many B/S, hehehe, stories there were but I figure one more couldn't hurt. Anyway if you don't like the ship blame a certain author who converted me to it. He knows who he is...I hope after all memory loss is a serious condition.

Anyway I know I've been sort of gone for a while but school will do that. I've got various stories started that I'm working on finish for posting and plotted out other ones. Hope you'll enjoy them when they come out.

Disclaimer: I don't own KP.


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